Tuesday, October 2, 2012
Tuesday, September 25, 2012
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
The talk from Elder Oaks that Bryce referred me to was very enlightening as well, so if you're interested in this subject, it's definitely worth a read.
And lastly, if you're interested but shorter on time, here are some snippets from the talk that I found most helpful.
Martha received Jesus into her house and worked to provide for Him while her sister Mary sat at Jesus’ feet and heard His words.
Monday, June 11, 2012
What does it mean to judge, or refrain from judging, others? When you make a deliberate effort "not to judge", what does that look like?
This is something that I realized I've always been kind of confused about, and I think that confusion needs to be resolved before I can make any progress in overcoming this fault.
For instance, if I'm trying not to judge others, does that mean I don't have any opinion on the actions of others?
Does it mean that while I may have an initial reaction to the actions of others, I must always be sure to remind myself that I don't know the whole story, and therefore have no right to make any real judgments?
Am I allowed to judge when the actions of others affect me?
If someone breaks into my house, kills my dog and eats all my otter pops, I'm pretty sure I'm not only going to have an opinion about these events, but I'm going to have an opinion about the person who did it. Should I wait to hear about this person's life history and the circumstances surrounding the event before I make that judgment? Or is it understood that I'm inevitably going to make a biased judgment at first, which will have to be corrected later?
What if a member of my ward gets up during testimony meeting one Sunday and bears what I believe to be a very irreverent, fairly offensive testimony (this may or may not have happened last Fast Sunday). Is it wrong for me to feel this way? I thought feelings were never wrong? How would a non-judgmental person handle this situation?
Insights are appreciated.
Also, good news:
See this impossibly adorable kid in the Hawaiian floral combo?
Well, he's all grown up now, and I get to marry him in TWELVE days.
I'm a little bit stoked about it.
Monday, May 7, 2012
|Black Hawk Family Day|
|Cute Mom so proud|
|Certificate from Sikorsky|
|Family Day again|
|So proud of him|
|Graduating class sitting patiently|
|Futuristic arms pin aviator|
|Band was there, too|
|Then started road trip|
|He once flew those|
|This is Alabama|
|Alabamans do this often|
|Thanks Mom and Dad!|
|We found a battleship!|
|JJ obviously thrilled|
|"Roam if you want to"|
|Passed through Biloxi, MS|
|I think says Louisiana?|
|"We're in Louisiana" faces|
|No wonder Katrina happened|
|Made it to Texas|
|San Antonio Riverwalk|
|We remembered it|
|Drove by Mexican border|
|Beautiful El Paso|
|Vegas was cool|
|Missed Bellagio Fountain Show :(|
|Genuine Fa smile!|
|Ma's purse model|
|Nerds, of course|
|High as my dreams|
|Obviously this happened, too|
|We hiked Stewart Falls|
|Carol Todd married finally!|
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
There's a scene in this episode of 30 rock, wherein Tina Fey's and Alec Baldwin's characters take a trip to Stone Mountain, Georgia in search of "real, middle-American talent." Tina Fey, skeptical about the existence of any kind of "real" American, expresses her worldview that all people are basically the same, having only the common desire to sit in peace and eat a sandwich. She sets this philosophy in action by ordering a carp sandwich "with extra chuckle" from a restaurant called Fatty Fat's Sandwich Ranch. Shortly after, at the hotel, Tina finds that the carp sandwich "is not agreeing with her worldview" and ends up toilet-side. Alec Baldwin enters to hand her a bottle of "Peppy Bismilk" sent up by the receptionist, at which an aggravated Tina Fey exclaims, "Why is everything a little different here?! I hate it!"
I think about this scene at least once a day, and it's not because I hate it here. It's just so true. For anyone who's spent any time in the American south, you know what's up. For those who haven't, let me just relate to you a few observations/incidents I've been witness to that have both delighted as well as given me pause:
- -Carl's Jr.? It's called Hardee's down here. I'm sure there's a reasonable explanation for this, but I was unprepared for it nonetheless.
- Everyone parks their vehicles on their lawns. Don't matter if your lawn is at an incline or 10ft x10 ft.
- People, especially big black mamas, aren't afraid to give you 'tude if you deserve it. My experience with old people prepared me for this a little bit.
- If you don't address a woman as ma'am, you're rude. I still haven't gotten the hang of this formality yet, which may be why I'm the recipient of so much 'tude.
- I actually heard someone say the phrase "Lawd Jesus" in exclamation the other day. For a middle-class suburban-raised white girl who's only known black vernacular in the form of young adult civil rights novels, it is exciting and actualizing to find that people actually talk like that.
- Everyone holds a yard sale every day. At least, I think that's what's going on...
- Why yes, I have seen someone riding their riding lawnmower down the sidewalk.
- The hottest hangout spot in town? It's called Cupcakes Y'all.
- There's always someone walking on the side of the road. Not hitchhiking - just walking, chillin' on the median, what have you, listening to their beatz and looking chillaxed. I debated throwing that last line in there cause it's maybe getting a little too racist, but it seemed essential to me in conveying to you just what I'm talking about.
- For anyone who thought maybe the so-called "Bible Belt" was a myth, I can tell you that there are a handful of well-to-do pastors down here who would have to disagree. I've never seen churches so big. Like Walmart Supercenters, I tell you.
- Guns. Ohhhhh, do people love their guns. I never thought I'd feel like such a black sheep for not owning one to keep in my purse at all times, but that day has come. And yet I can't shake the feeling that they're the weird ones, not me. Yes, I was officially raised in the Pacific Northwest.
- One Saturday night I was googling "things to do in Dothan, AL" (that ought to produce a chuckle right there) and came across a list that some poor, persevering soul had put together. The list consisted mainly of antique doll shops and golf courses, but there at the end, I found it: #25. Peanut Monument. Giant, gold peanut sculpture at Visitor Information Center helps to proclaim Dothan as Peanut Capital of the World." No offense, but we went to Cracker Barrel instead.
- I think I once heard somewhere that people in the south refer to all carbonated drinks as "Coke" (maybe that was a Utah thing? Getting my stereotypes mixed up). The point is, I believe it now.
Also, Exhibit B:
You get the gist. I love it down here, I really do. It turns out that Southern Hospitality is also a real thing, and I've been the recipient of it at every turn. I'm grateful for the cultural immersion I've experienced here and I look forward to many, many more culture shocks as I begin my new job in a somewhat ghetto part of town.*
Also, I feel like it's too late now to write some gushy post about being engaged and all that, but I will say that we're happy, in love, pretty scared, but also excited. Jdub is the source of everything good about me, and I feel so lucky that I get to be his Mdub soon and forever.
*Edit 3/7/12; Yep, I called it. Today on my first day of work, I not only got a rapper's business card (they're called The MiZfiTZ, and they wanna say thanks to all haters), but also made friends with an exotic dancer. The lady mentions that she's a dancer, and that she's buying this funky duct tape to tape her stilettos with. "Oh really, what kind of dance do you do?" I ask conversationally as I ring up her lime green lace panties. Did I mention I grew up white, middle-class, suburban and sheltered?
Monday, February 13, 2012
is not my strong point. We all know this. Let's just get it out on the table right now that anything interesting you've ever heard from me came out on this blog. Also, most likely if you ever tried to discuss said interesting thing with me at a later time, in person, I probably didn't have much to say about it anymore. Maybe the Mish you know in person is not the one who writes on here?
But actually it turns out I'm just really slow. Slow to figure out what I'm thinking. Slow to translate those thoughts into intelligible conversation. By the time I figure out what I want to say and how best to say it, the moment has usually passed. So I usually smile and agree, and that is that.
Obviously all this means is that introversion has reared its ugly head once more. But instead of my usual session of Introvert Apologetics, this time I think I ought to just apologize.
Because I am so slow to speak, I find that I miss a lot of opportunities to do good. I have suppressed many generous thoughts in my day. I have let slip many opportunities to comfort and encourage. Maybe part is because I don't find the words in time. But I know a lot is because I'm scared. Scared of what, not sure.
I guess I just want you all to know that I agree - this is a totally lame way to live. Tina Fey shared this point, sort of, via clever improv analogy.
The first rule of improvisation is AGREE. Always agree and SAY YES. When you’re improvising, this means you are required to agree with whatever your partner has created. So if we’re improvising and I say, “Freeze, I have a gun,” and you say, “That’s not a gun. It’s your finger. You’re pointing your finger at me,” our improvised scene has ground to a halt. But if I say, “Freeze, I have a gun!” and you say, “The gun I gave you for Christmas! You scumbag!” then we have started a scene because we have AGREED that my finger is in fact a Christmas gun.So I'm working on it. YES, AND is not a natural way for me. Or at least, out loud it isn't. But I'm tired of letting my generous thoughts slip by. Plus, I'm pretty sure I'm gonna be held accountable for all those missed opportunities, someday.
Now, obviously in real life you’re not always going to agree with everything everyone says. But the Rule of Agreement reminds you to “respect what your partner has created” and to at least start from an open-minded place. Start with a YES and see where that takes you.
As an improviser, I always find it jarring when I meet someone in real life whose first answer is no. “No, we can’t do that.” “No, that’s not in the budget.” “No, I will not hold your hand for a dollar.” What kind of way is that to live?
The second rule of improvisation is not only to say yes, but YES, AND. You are supposed to agree and then add something of your own. If I start a scene with “I can’t believe it’s so hot in here,” and you just say, “Yeah…” we’re kind of at a standstill. But if I say, “I can’t believe it’s so hot in here,” and you say, “What did you expect? We’re in hell.” Or if I say, “I can’t believe it’s so hot in here,” and you say, “Yes, this can’t be good for the wax figures.” Or if I say, “I can’t believe it’s so hot in here,” and you say, “I told you we shouldn’t have crawled into this dog’s mouth,” now we’re getting somewhere.
To me YES, AND means don’t be afraid to contribute. It’s your responsibility to contribute. Always make sure you’re adding something to the discussion. Your initiations are worthwhile.
P.S. If you ever bring up this post in person, I will obviously have nothing further to say on the matter.